Holy $H!T

One of my favorite times of the day is the early morning hours when I can hear the girls waking up. Talking to themselves and each other is both sweet and comical. So when I heard Lucy saying over and over again, "no-no Greta...no-no", I giggled a little in my sleepy haze as to what Greta could be doing. And in true "good mommy" form, elbowed Norm in the ribs to go get the girls; mumbling something about it being his turn.
But a little extra shut-eye was not in my cards. No sooner had he rolled out of bed that I heard him yell, "BETHHHHH....GET IN HERE"! As I tried to untangle my feet from the sheets and stumble out of bed, I see Norm holding our sweet baby out, like a disease, crying for Mommy and covered in....POOP. Poop in her hair. Poop in her mouth. Poop all over her face and suckie. Poop EVERYWHERE! Norm, like a deer in headlights, looks to me for direction. "BATH TUB. BATH TUB. GO. BATH TUB", is all I can manage to utter. Its so disgusting...and the wafting smell of poop is starting to seep out of there room. As Norm races Greta (still at arms length) to the bathroom, I bravely step into their room to survey the damage! HOLY $H!T! No really...there is $H!T everywhere. The back story to my rude awakening is beginning to unfold in front of my eyes. As I lean over her bed I see a diaper cast aside and a huge poop with little Greta finger prints all over it. It appears that Greta (that little stinker), removed her poopie diaper and played with it. Smeared it in the crib walls, sheets, blankets, and suckies. She also tried to eat it. No wonder Lucy was yelling No-No! YUCK!
In the end, both Greta and crib survived no worse for wear. But life lesson taken from this poopscapade...always make sure Greta is wearing shorts or pants to bed!